In giving advice, seek to help, not to please your friend!
Ok, so if you really know me then you know that I cannot take or should I say do not like to take criticism. Especially, if I am in a group setting and it seems like everyone is coming down on me. I actually hate that with a passion. But I am learning that when in the growth element of your life, everything that you can’t take and everything that you dislike, that’s going to be the most common thing that you’re experiencing.
On Saturday, me and my husband went out with our very close friends (sister and bro). So just a little background, these friends are a married couple and we met them through some other friends of ours. It was an instant connection, we were all attracted to light inside one another. Our spirits were so kindred and we vibed so well. So we exchanged numbers and now we are inseparable. We meet at least once a week and if not we normally don’t go longer than two weeks and we talk everyday. The shocker is, myself and the other wife in this group are seriously TWINS. Our attitudes and persona’s are identical and when one of us are in error we are not afraid to tell each other, although its normally a flaw that we both have.
Anyway, we were out and we were talking, in the midst of the conversation somehow my blog came up. I was telling them about my future goals and what I wanted out of the career that I’ve started and what I am currently working on. Well, that conversation turned into a whole Jai do better convo. They were telling me ways to improve my blog and giving me pointers on the things that I need to be doing, versus the things that I am doing now. Now in the midst of this conversation my husband is going in, he’s in total agreement and in my mind I’m thinking “Uhm Hello, your supposed to be on my side!” Well my sister friend tapped me when she seen my face and told me that they are not trying to come down on me, but we are all meant to succeed and if they don’t tell me things to better me then they don’t want true success for me. So I really had to take that in and consider the fact that these are people that I truly value and I would much rather it be them than someone that I don’t know at all who wishes nothing for me.
I began to truly take into consideration what they were saying and I have decided to not only listen, but put into action to the best of my ability. I have also learned that my husband wasn’t really going hard, but he just wants to have an answer to all my problems because he want success for me. And he wants everything to go right, and if it’s not going right he wants to fix it. I’ve learned throughout the years that this is one way that he shows his love for me. And if he didn’t do it, then, there would be a problem because I would then know that he’s comfortable in my downfalls. It took me a while to get to this point, but I am definitely here right now and I am truly willing to listen and act on the things that I’ve heard.
So, to my followers, I am now going to be more present and reachable for you. I will make it a goal to be more personal and consistent. I want to be what I know I can and I want to make it a goal to be and do whatever it is that God has for me to be. To my friends and spouse, I am listening and appreciate the advice that was given. Please know that I thank you and am so grateful to have you in my life. Let this work begin!!
If there is no correction when at fault, then what is your definition of friendship?