The fear of bringing you here is now the strength that nurtures your very being!
-Jai-

I never thought that one title could truly change my entire life. For I have been called many things in this lifetime, but there is this one title, that has changed my mind, life, and being. A title that for that one little person, no one else in this world will ever be able to claim. One, that will always be around and even if not physically, protecting you spiritually. That title is Mommy!
I never in my life planned on having children. Not that I was opposed to the idea, it was just never anything that I thought I truly wanted. I wanted to be the cool aunt, the amazing gmommy, and that real cool best friend for all the little people I came in contact with. Lol, isn’t it amazing the plans you have for yourself vs. the plans that God has already made for you. I just knew that I would be everything in this world except a wife and a mom. Well, as you can see, all of that has changed.

I never thought my husband would be able to give a gift so unforgettable. A gift that I could truly care for and watch grow. One that I could mold and protect with everything I have. I never thought, that this gift would truly change my life and give a guaranteed smile for as long as I live, but he did. That gift, I like to call him, Bailyr Liam!
You have come into my life and moved all my furniture around. You changed my way of thinking, you have given me a level of respect and love for your father that no one can ever measure up to. You are the light of my world and the shining star during my darkest moments. I love you soo much! You are apart of the reason why I am so thankful that God paid no attention to my wants, but had me to fulfill HIS desires. Being your mom is a total gift and a task that I will definitely complete to the best of my ability.

There will never in this lifetime be a moment that you don’t feel me near and know that I love you and I am here. Everything that I do, I am sure to consider you. My greatest desire is to make sure that you’re ok and well taken care of, both mentally and physically. I know that I won’t be perfect, but my love for you was created in the light of perfection. I will live not only to teach you what’s right, but by showing you as well. Being the best example that I know how.
Me and your father are striving and living daily to make sure that your future is great and holds all that you can imagine. I am glad that God chose the perfect example of a man in his image that you can call Daddy. Just to think of the fact that God looked down on us, and thought that we would be the perfect set of parents for you is a gift. I know that we will make mistakes, but we will do our very best to correct them. We will never go to sleep mad, we will always acknowledge our wrongs and love for one another, and we will be the best examples of God’s love, that we know how. God will be apart of our daily living and we will ensure that you know him for yourself. For that, is the biggest thank you we can give to him for giving us such a precious gift.

One day, when you’re older, you will be able to read these posts and know that your mommy loved and made you apart of everything. So, to you Bailyr Liam Martin, today is your third birthday and I love everything about you. Even your smart mouth and horrible attitude (lol) and even when Mommy is giving you pop pops they’re all out of love and because she wants you to be the best you! You’re my gift and the one sacrifice in my life that I am willing to let it all go for. I love you baby and I can’t wait to see what this year holds for us!

A mothers love can never be replaced or changed, it can be held at fault at times due to errors on her behalf, but the key is to acknowledge your wrongs and show your child that even as a Mom, she will mess up, but you will always feel the love in her heart and the humility in her demeanor when seeking the love, understanding, and forgiveness of her child.
-Jai-