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  • Everyone in society should be a role model, not only for their own self-respect, but for respect from others.

    -Barry Bonds-

    There are so many different roles to play in this thing we call life, and some of those are left empty. Why? Sometimes because we feel like they aren’t high enough, it won’t get you a name, nobody will remember that, we aren’t important enough, or simply because we feel it’s unimportant.

    I have been struggling in my life for the longest, trying to figure out what part I play. Where do I fit in in my family, who am I supposed to be in church, in my own daily life and the lives of my associates. I’ve sometimes felt like I can’t really be my true self or step outside what I felt was comfortable for me because people would judge me or think something negative about me.

    One of my questions was, what is my role here on earth? Ever have that feeling that no matter how hard you work it will never be good enough. That’s how I’ve felt a majority of my life, simply because I’d spent a majority of it trying to please others. I would try to get the approval from family members and even others, just to hear that some of those family members took the good that I was doing and tried to use it against me. They would talk bad about me, or how I thought I was so much better than everyone else and much more, BELIEVE ME. Now, my parents have always been my biggest supporters and of course that felt great and made things a bit easier, but I still had a struggle.

    So I received my answer one Sunday in church. I was going into church as normal and this young girl that ushers on youth Sunday asked could she talk to me outside. So I of course said yes. In this conversation my eyes were opened and I felt so much GOOD pressure. The young lady told me that my outer appearance is great, but that she truly loves who I am on the inside. She also said, that I inspire her to be the young lady that she knows God wants her to be. Informing me, that my efforts weren’t going unnoticed or taken in the wrong way, but that she took them as I can actually be the person that I appear to be. She also said that because of that she is so much more confident and wants to fulfill her role. She will never know how much she inspired me and made me want to do better.

    My point here is take your life and who you are seriously. Because although it may not always be confirmed or stated out loud, someone is always watching. Someone is always seeking your example and wanting to take some of the same steps you did. Some people also just want to hear your voice. BE THE PERSON THAT GOD MADE YOU TO BE AND BE THAT IN CONFIDENCE!

    I am who I am regardless of your thoughts or negative words. I am who God wants me to be, but most importantly I am who she needs me to be!

    -Jai-

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    5 Comments

    1. Octavia Nicholas
      April 15, 2019 / 3:23 pm

      This is a wonderful Blog like seriously. I have been trying to please others all my life as well being half my family is in ministry. However, I had to first build a relationship with God myself,then I had to Love Myself enough to say ok I’m my own person and when I decide to do things I feel will help someone else I do just that. I always no matter how negative a situation is I try to look at it in a learning and positive way,because people are watching and when they think you are strong sometimes if you respond in a negative manner they might become confused because of the light that shines from me. The recently I was at work in the break room and a lady wanted a new shirt for work and she asked the uniform lady if she could deduct it from
      Her check and the answer was no. She walked away with her head down. Now this ladies husband just had 2 strokes and was struggling financially and I knew that but I didn’t say anything. I continued with my purchase, which I bought shirts. I took them to my car and started working. Then I thought give her one of the shirts because God had blessed you beyond what people can see and you know what it’s like to struggle. So I obeyed God and gave it to her. The smile she gave me almost made me cry because it’s the smallest things in life that makes people keep going. When I seen her st work again she wore that shirt with a big smile she even put on make up and everything. I was so happy to see her smiling because since her husband had been sick you could tell her mind was slipping. So I thank god for uses us in the shadows of life. Love you chic.

      • styledbyjai
        Author
        April 15, 2019 / 5:59 pm

        It takes a lot sometimes to realize your place and know that you’re doing something great! You know I’ve always loved you and you’ve been helping me since I was little! I’m always watching lol. I love you Scrilla!!!!

    2. Marchio
      April 15, 2019 / 6:31 pm

      WOW! These words are beyond your years young lady! May GOD continue to work in and through you.

      #DaddysBABY!

    3. styledbyjai
      Author
      April 16, 2019 / 2:07 am

      Thank You 🙂

    4. Phylicia
      May 22, 2019 / 6:26 pm

      this. There is so much truth to this, especially when more roles are added to your life. It can confuse you on which direction or what to do. It’s just up to us to daily walk in each role, confidently, and know that God has a plan. I love this!

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